The Story of Nicholas' Early Arrival: Rainy Day- Indoor Fun

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Rainy Day- Indoor Fun

Nick and his best friend Bella playing together

He loves Jungle time

Contemplating grabbing the dangling things, and soon enough he does.

Not much has been going on with Nicholas this week. I'm back at work full time so Mark is playing Mr. Mom during the day and working at night. So far it is working out well we just never see each other. Nicholas is being a little stinker with his cannula. Mark said when he got home from work last night he found Nicholas sleeping with is completely off his face and in his hand. I hope the pulmonologist says we can take him off of it when we go see him on the 15th. I decided it was time to stop pumping. I cut back on my pumps when Nicholas was in the children's hospital and was down to twice a day. Well I ran out of my expensive medication for milk production and don't want to buy any more. My milk really went down without the pills so I did my last pump the other night. I'm a little sad because it was my milk that helped him so much in the NICU but he got it at the most important time. I pumped for a few days shy of 7 months which is a long time and I've been ready to quit for a while.

2 comments:

Aunt PatJune 5, 2009 at 1:21 PM
Nick is so adorable! I'm glad he has a friend in Bella. Nick is her little puppy. It's hard to believe Nick is deaf because he looks so alert. I pray for all of you frequently and hope Nick continues to get better and better each day. Love, Aunt Pat Matthews
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AngieJune 6, 2009 at 10:15 PM
OMG, look at that smile!!! I love it! Oh, I miss him so much, I just want to squeeze him! Corinne, you did soooo good with pumping!! YOU should be very proud of yourself!! Seven months is a very long time especially pumping. Nicholas is so much stronger because you made that decision. I am very proud of you for that!!I hope to see ya'll very soon! I miss you all!!
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Preemie Experience

The Preemie Experience
The preemie experience is the shattering of all your dreams
For a normal, healthy delivery,
Of the ability to carry home a beautiful squirming bundle
After a short stay in the hospital.
It is lying there in your hospital room listening to
The happy sounds of whole families joined
Together by the birth of a grandchild, cousin, niece,
or nephew, and knowing that your
Child is miles away and may not survive long enough
For you to see or simply touch.
It is that first glimpse of a skinny, scrawny, not much bigger
Than a Barbie doll child
And feeling, fear, awe, and joy for such a fragile soul.
It is sitting by your baby’s “bedside” day after day,
Week after week, month after month,
Alternating between the emotional high of “Look, his eyes are open,” or “he’s crying!”
And the lows of “I’m sorry, something has shown up in the ultrasound,”
Or even “There is nothing we can do…”
It is hearing the alarms go off for the twentieth time in less
Than fifteen minutes because your
Child’s heart rate keeps hitting zero.
It is watching children dying around you, wondering if
Your child will be next.
It is hearing your child’s cry of distress as the nurses
Insert yet another IV and do another
Round of daily blood tests.
It is meeting other parents of children who are doing far better
And wondering, “Why me?”
And meeting parents of children who have just died,
And praising God for His mercy
To your child and feeling guilty because your child is alive
And someone else is grieving for theirs.
It is days of nightmarish testing and coping with less
Than positive results to the tests.
It is days of joy at seeing the first eyelash appear,
The child gain a whole ounce in one day,
And two bright shiny eyes look at you and into your soul,
And knowing that your child now recognizes you as Mama or Dada;
Or perhaps looks at you and does not see you at all…
It is that final hurdle before coming home!
It is the sorrow of waiting for the monitor company Representative to show you what to do
If the alarm sounds when your child is choking,
Gasping for breath, or simply dying.
It is the joy of just being away from all those nurses
And tubes and wires and beeps, and
Walking into the nursery you hastily prepared because,
after all,
The child wasn’t due for another four months!
It is thinking the nightmare is over…only to realize it still Continues in the form of
Such acronyms as PVL, RSV, BPD, CP and numerous others.
It is the final realization that those developmental delays
Have to be dealt with,
That reflux is a normal and unfortunate
occurrence in most preemies,
That the constant fight to gain weight is in direct proportion
To a preemie’s ability to do so.
It is watching a child struggle to pick up his or her head, sit, Crawl, or walk.
It is witnessing only silence when the child should be babbling,
Because the child cannot hear.
It is the mental images of a child running and playing
And communicating with others in a
Perfectly normal manner that are marred when you face years of therapy
In order to simply get the child to eat by himself or herself,
To talk or walk and then run.

The preemie experience is a journey…A journey through your soul in order to find the faith and strength to cope,
A journey of the mind when you face the emotional weariness,
A journey of the heart…to accept that, no matter what,

This child is yours,
And you will love this child no matter what.

The Story of Nicholas' Early Arrival

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Rainy Day- Indoor Fun

2 comments:

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